G posted this update on FB last night:
“She’s recovering from the PET scan and second biopsy. We are praying that the results of this biopsy will finally confirm the type of cancer so we can begin treatment tomorrow. We’re still playing the waiting game so asking for the continued prayers and positive energy that we get the right answer followed with the right treatment. All this girl will remember are the unlimited popsicles and Frozen on TV.”
What a roller coaster ride of emotions yesterday. I was anxious. I felt a moment of calm. I cried. I felt assured. I was hurried. I was relieved when I finally saw my baby girl laying awake, unfazed and still in the hospital bed with a popsicle in one hand and the other arm under her head. It’s always a feeling of anxiety as you approach the recovery room, then a deep breath and sigh when you are reunited. She’s normally very feisty and combative whenever a nurse approaches. But she was in rare form last night. We were so impressed at how relaxed she was.
Waking up this morning (and every morning this past week) is a bitter reminder of reality. Opening my eyes to get my bearings, then everything comes back to me. Reminded we are in this situation. That our sweet Samar is ill and that the journey ahead is still long and tough.
I won’t lie. I had hoped for “that” miracle yesterday. A doctor delivering the news that the PET scan had shown no tumors, no cancer. I would fall to my knees in thanksgiving, hug my sweet girl so tight she’d groan in annoyance, and share the good news with all of you.
Unfortunately, that wasn’t the outcome so we press forward in faith, trusting that we are at the best place to get her well.
And when I see that little red notification button from FB, I see the continuous well wishes and am reminded that we are being lifted up in prayer, thought about in positivity and sent over healing energy.
We were chosen for this path and I try not to question. As has always held true in my life, things happen for a reason. We may not always understand why but eventually a reason manifests itself whether we recognize it or not. And those in itself are miracles.